Frustrated at the end of the day? The problem may be a lack of focus.

Ready to try a game?

I picked this up from my friend Pete at Digital Detangler: On a piece of paper or note app, make a “column A” and a “column B”. In column A, you’ll list as many animals as you can. In column B, you’ll try to name all the state capitals. The goal is to list as many as possible in 90 seconds. The catch is that you have to switch lists/tasks every 7 seconds.

You likely don’t need to play the game to know that very shortly you’d become quite frustrated. Whenever your mind settles on…

Photo by Ketut Subiyanto from Pexels

20 years of marriage is not long enough to know everything. But it is long enough to learn a whole lot of things about relationships and family–including many things NOT to do (often learned in the hardest of ways). When I look at the rough patches of my shared marital relationship, I can see there are eight habits that bring discord to my marriage.

Here are eight relationship-damaging habits:

Not ‘fessing up when I’m upset

I often leaned into a toxic belief that I should just “man up” and deal with my emotions on my own. I believed my problems were my problems and I should…

Man holding head in hands seated at table
Man holding head in hands seated at table
Photo by Andrew Neel from Pexels

For 20 years we’ve been dealing with it. In the early days, we didn’t know what “it” was. We didn’t know why my spouse flew high on so many days then crashed into valleys of oblivion for many more. We didn’t know why drinking was such a problem for her.

Even when we were told “it” was bipolar disorder, we still didn’t understand what we were dealing with. We believed it might go away. Every time my spouse cycled up, we thought she was cured and ceased treatment. When she cycled down into depression we tried to reason our way…

Why do you seem to never have enough money? I’ve been asking myself this question most of my adult life. The question often came in moments of exasperation, like when I wanted to buy something but didn’t have the money to do so. It wasn’t until I found myself in a job that should have been providing well for my family, but yet I still faced the same old money troubles, that I looked at the real reasons I never seemed to have enough money. These are the behaviors I found were sabotaging my family’s financial well-being. …

Image by Victor Freitas,

Is it possible to boost your testosterone level through diet and nutrition? The science is a little inconclusive. We can eat foods rich in nutrients that are used in testosterone production. But how effective that is in noticeably boosting testosterone hasn’t been proven. So I did my own test through a testosterone-boosting diet.

As a 44-year old man, my testosterone levels are likely not what they once were. Testosterone production drops as we age–generally by about 1% per year beginning around age 40. But natural factors and lifestyle habits contribute to more pronounced drops in some men. …

I wonder if we’ll tell new stories after this. I wonder if we’ll let go of our need to impress and entertain with each story we tell, and, instead, simply share stories that inform.

As of writing, we are in the midst of COVID-19/coronavirus shelter-in-place orders. I recently got word that my office will be closed for another month. All non-essential businesses in my city are directed to close.

The federal government released a report that as many as 200,000 people could die as a result of the pandemic. That makes stuff real. That’s a big number. …

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“I’m an American and I have the right to be happy, gum-dummit!” Isn’t that inalienable? I get life, liberty, and to pursue happiness. It’s an American ideal that we strive for happiness.

Is happiness a worthwhile pursuit? Is it an achievable goal? The more I’ve sought, the more I’ve discovered that happiness is a fleeting state. And to pursue it leaves me under-satisfied and feeling a little bit empty.

Part of the issue at hand is that I often mistake pleasure for happiness. But pleasure and happiness are not the same. Eating a gallon of ice cream is pleasurable, but…

First, let me admit this is an aspirational post. The first time my spouse reads this, she’ll likely think “I can’t remember I heard any of these things from him…”

She’ll have good reason to think that. Odds are I haven’t said many of them in a long while.

I didn’t develop this post because I’ve already experienced some great rewards for the kind words I’ve used in regards to my family. I wrote this as a way of developing a plan for better communicating my care towards my family. So the following represents the 10 things I perceive my…

Ryan Dunn

Blogger, podcaster, minister. Not aging without a fight. The best is yet to come!

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